Painting Enso workshops, London

Some of last years attendees artwork © Adele Cloony

People in the South may be interested in the Enso painting workshops with Adele Cloony on 9th and 10th September. Click here for more details.

Finding your flow

An interesting episode of Life Cycle on Radio Scotland today, encouraging people to do less... Available to listen again here for a month.

New Year

New Year's resolutions are not my thing, but over the less-busy period between terms I often have time to re-affirm certain habits or practices that are nourishing. This year, like last year, that involves sitting meditation, but crafting and reading for pleasure have made a return. Extinction Rebellion have a good set of daily focuses this week, and the themes change each day, giving food for thought, action, creativity or quiet reflection. Have a look here.

Dorset rainbow September 2018

Annapurna Pilgrimage

Below is a message from my great friend Kajedo, my first meditation teacher, and second T'ai Chi Teacher (he studied with the Kobayashis who were students of Dr Chi). He has been guiding groups walking in Nepal Himalaya for almost 30 years. I was booked to go with him in 2000, but a back injury prevented this, yet led to me finding The T'ai Chi Centre, which is another story... If you have ever wanted to trek in these high mountains and spend time with people who are also 'on the path', then get in touch and I will pass your email on to Kajedo. He doesn't have a website, and works outdoors managing the hinterland at Findhorn community, which means he manages trees, protects wildlife and land, learns about the hundreds of rare lichens there, takes people out into nature, built a wild camping site to protect other at-risk sites from damage, teaches meditation and T'ai Chi...

'Walking on the roof of the world...

A pilgrimage....

     From Mid February to mid March 2019 I will be walking amongst the highest mountains of the world again- in the Annapurna range of the Nepalese Himalayas... Yes, I have done this so many times before - but it is calling me back again. One of the most beautiful mountain walks on our planet - the constantly changing landscapes - we'll fly from subtropical Pokhara into the mountains - lower Mustang, close to the Tibetan border... and we'll walk through that mountain desert country to Muktinath - a sacred town for Buddhist and Hindus - at over 3000m altitude - a day of stunning close-up views on the white tops of the mountains... We'll descend through pine forests and rice paddies, climb up again through Rhododendron forest - which, with any luck should be flowering by then... Annapurna Sanctuary at over 4000m altitude will be the highest point of our journey.

     Our ups and downs of our trek are the ups and downs of our life... It is as much an inner journey as an outer one... We practice non-attachment as we keep moving from place to place... mindfulness of our body and breath comes naturally when walking those trails for hours... And we allow the mountains to teach us about serenity, and the people of Nepal about what might be important in life.... A journey to get perspective on our lives... I'm putting this out now to see if anybody feels the call to join me. If you are interested, have questions or feel the call be part of this sacred journey - Let me know...'

Annapurna image from mountainkingdoms.com

Training

Training

or

To Be a Nature Spirit

The student of internal martial arts had been studying diligently for many years with her master and had worked her way up through the school. One day her master said, ‘It is time for you to go and work for two years with the old woman on the mountain, you are ready to study with her now.’

Feeling rather pleased with herself, she packed her bundle and practice swords, and said goodbye to her class mates, who were all very impressed with her, which she secretly loved, even as she brushed it off. She headed up the mountain the following day, looking forward to learning secret techniques and special moves, maybe some subtle power-building nei-gung breathing exercises.

She passed quickly through the ancient forest and up to the top of the tree-line, not noticing how the birds fell silent as she brushed her way through their territory. At the edge of the forest was an old shack, quite run-down, with a veranda around the front and sides. ‘Right, you’re here,’ said the old woman, ‘put down your things and come sweep this porch, then you can make me some supper.’

Not even asking her name! What an affront. This old lady has forgotten all her social skills… thought the younger woman. But she knew it would be a grave offence to say anything, and cause loss of face. So she bent to the tasks and at nightfall slept like a dog on the veranda on her bedroll.

In the morning she had decided to put the slights behind her and was again looking forward to her special training.

‘Follow the sound of water and make your way down to the river side,’ said the old woman, ‘you’ll find the whole area coated in fine clay washed down from the glacier. I want you to take a handful of it and roll it between your hands until it is a perfectly spherical ball, then place the clay ball on the flat rocks beside the river to dry. Do this all day as many times as you can. Come back when it is time to cook my supper.’

Mortified, the young woman headed straight to the river, muttering under her breath and wishing herself back at her teacher’s school, pushing hands with the lads or cracking jokes whilst drinking jasmine tea, telling tall tales of scrapes and clever escapes. All day long until her hands were chapped and chilled, she rolled the balls, returning back to the shack in time to sweep and cook food, then fall asleep, shattered.

The next morning, expecting another crazy task, she got only a nod and a dismissive wave of the hand to send her back to the river bed, to roll clay balls and leave them drying in the sun. At the end of the week she thought ‘Surely some change is due?’ At the end of the month she thought, ‘Is this some kind of joke?’ After two months, she thought, ‘Is this a kind of hell, a punishment?’ After six months, she’d been though all five stages of grief, and made up a few of her own, based loosely around fury and retribution. After 11 months of this working , sweeping, cooking, sleeping, she had accepted that this was her life for the next 13 months, and she stopped thinking about it at all, and found she could hear the birdsong changing as the day progressed and as the seasons transformed. After a year, the entire river valley was covered with even little clay balls, as far as the eye could see, on every flat or nearly flat surface. There was no clay left to use, not even any rough silt.

The following day, the old woman called the student into her hut and said, ‘Today, I want you to go down to the river and taking a clay ball in each hand, squeeze your fingers together until the balls are crushed back to dust. Then sweep this dust back into the river bed, from where you got it, and leave no trace at all. Do this with every single clay ball, be sure not to leave even one unpulverized.’ The student got up in a daze, and headed back down to the river, cursing the stupid crone under her breath. Mindless, idiotic, ridiculous work, backbreaking, limb-chilling pointless task… Within a fortnight she was settled in the rhythm of the days again, and had stopped swearing under her breath, or going through revenge fantasies in her mind. In fact, sometimes when she tried to recall what she had been thinking about all day long at the water’s edge, she found she couldn’t. Perhaps her mind had wandered-off, perhaps she had ‘vagued-out’. But no, when she paid attention to what her mind was doing, well, it wasn’t wandering, it was just very still, no chatter, no matter.

After another year and a day, the old woman came out early to where the student was sleeping and woke her with her bundle and some tea. ‘Time to go back down the mountain. You have done everything you came to do.’ And with that the old woman went behind the huge old tree that grew beside the hut, or perhaps into the tree, it was hard to tell. The younger woman shouldered her bundle, took a last glance around the glade, bowed almost imperceptibly and headed down the mountain path. The birds were singing as she stepped quietly through the trees. Mosses cushioned the ground in every hue of green. Beetles drummed their feet on the soil.

Half way down the mountain, in the thick of an old-growth wood, too steep for coppicing, a band of thieves was hiding out, after robbing carriages on the valley-floor road. Seeing a lone woman walking through the woods, the four men rubbed their hands together in spiteful glee, the universal gesture of corruption. This would be fun, they thought, as one. Together they approached the woman, whose expressionless face proved just how stupid she was to be walking there, and how richly she deserved what was coming. She looked right at them then, put down her bundle and reached up spontaneously above her head. Effortlessly grasping the thick branch of bony oak in her hands, with an echoing ‘crack!’ it came away from the tree, and she stood, naturally, holding it like a staff, or perhaps an oar, as though to push out a boat upon a still lake.

The men took fright at such unexpected power and grace, sudden movement, and most unnerving all, the lack of fear. ‘A nature-spirit! Run!’ cried their leader, and off they sped, leaving their booty, forgetting their weapons, pissing themselves.

The woman watched until the thieves were gone, the noise of their escape making it clear as day where they were heading, into the next valley. Gazing around, she quietly took in the beauty of the place where she stood. She put down the branch underneath the tree from which it came, picked up her bundle, and carried on back down the path, towards her classmates, her teacher, and home.

This is my version of a superb teaching story I read in a book of Mark's many years ago. The book is packed deep in a box somewhere and may one day see the light of day again, and if it does, I will post it here. The story made a deep impression on me, and I have always used it for teaching, both T'ai Chi and art. It is a classic story of training the mind in meditation: repetitive tasks and particularly 'the robbers' feature in so many Buddhist or Taoist mind-training stories. The robbers are thought, opinion, emotions, etc. Ah but it is even a good tale taken at face value, as an illustration of hubris melted by sincerity, naturalness, perseverance.

Intent and practice

Correct mind intent
plus physical repetition
equals practice.


Without correct mind intent one is 'going through the motions'.
Without physical repetition you have imaginary practice, only good for developing imaginary skills.
Mind and body correctly joined is a joy in itself.
The answer to 'why do it?' is 'the question is not relevant'.

Oh dear, must we get it right then? Ha, no! Just start. With singing, drawing, meditating, crafting, writing, T'ai Chi and gardening, in my experience, there is no 'correct state of mind' in which to begin. Starting is so much more important than anything else, despite what I have written above, which is about honing, rather than setting out. If you are finding it hard to set out try this:
Are you feeling annoyed? Do annoyed practice!
Are you feeling angry / inadequate / over-excited / dull / bored / confused / delete as appropriate?
Do that practice!
Pretty soon it won't be at all like it was when you started anyway. In fact, by the end you probably won't remember what flavour of affected state you were in anyway.

Move the pen or brush, make or mend that small thing, hum an old or new tune, write or type some random letters and words, do the form or warm ups, sit and watch the breath or feel the body. Something will change in us and therefore in the world. Nothing changes by sitting there dwelling on it. Even just walking around aimlessly is better than that. What is this thing that changes? What makes it change? What is this mysterious intent thing? These are good questions. I have been working on that last one 10 years, both awake and asleep, and I still don't have an answer in words, but I have a strong feeling, and a whole bunch more excellent questions with which to break my brain.

Where the sea is 

The mind isn't. 

Fire and Shadow

I am very excited to have been invited to teach on this wonderful 8 month course Fire and Shadow. A collaboration between Dark Mountain and Way Of Nature, this looks set to be a deep and transformative course which starts in May in the wilds of Alladale in Scotland, and I am delighted to be taking part. There's a video and lots of information at the link, so do have a look. I'll write more next week after my mammoth T'ai Chi fortnight comes to an end. For now, just to say I'll be teaching my ancient natural painting, drawing and writing materials, keeping it low on words, grounded in the physical transformations of plant, mineral and animal (feathers - naturally moulted!) to make beautiful kit with which to make our marks in the world. This will take place at the original hearth- the open fireside. The second week in nature will be in October in a national park in Transylvania, Romania, which looks totally beautiful. There will be plenty of time for meditation, stillness in nature, as well as T'ai Chi and Chi Gung. I'll also be leading some of the online and meet-up sessions that are planned. I am able to offer a discount to any T'ai Chi colleagues who'd like to join us, just get in touch.

We'll be making ink over the fire with rusty nails and oak galls,

and pens or brushes with goose and swan feathers.

We'll mix up paints in shells from ochres, earths, plant roots

and semi- precious stones with cherry tree gum as a binder.

My camp in the Great Ridge Woods 2 years ago.

A few logs and sticks can be a home.

Meditation centres

A few folks have asked if I am still going to do the mini retreat in Dorset but I have decided not to, as I will be in Gothenburg when I had planned it. I was asked to recommend good places for retreats and below are a couple I have personally been to which I am happy to recommend.

Gaia House in Devon is where I sat an excellent Son (Zen) retreat with Stephen and Martine Batchelor. I plan to return to Gaia House, but I would also recommend any retreat the Batchelors are running. They are superb teachers, and their books give a good introduction to each of their approaches. In terms of nearness to my own Taoist practice, I would say the Son retreat is as close as I could find. Other classmates have been regularly to this retreat too.

Sharpham Barn is a wonderful place near Totnes offering both solitary and group retreats. I have been twice to their meditation hut called the kuti for week long silent solitaries. The centre itself is also really well run and friendly. They run themed weeks too.

You can search this blog for posts and pictures from these places.

In the past I have sat retreats at Newbold House in Scotland, but I haven't been for many years. I have attended day sits at Rigpa in North London and Shambala Centre in Clapham, both are in the Tibetan tradition and both were good. My dear T'ai Chi brother David has been on a full-on 10 day Goenka retreat which is the Vipassana style of sitting. Yuval Noah Harari does 40 days of this a year, which I can only admire. My body does not appreciate only sitting without any walking, but the centres are very well respected and run retreats worldwide. There is a Soto Zen sitting group in Wimbledon that meets each week, I went along, it was fine.

Now I sit daily at home, usually on a zafu (cushion) on a small flat cushion on my rug near the stove, sometimes elsewhere. I use Thomas Cleary's meditation books as a guide as well as much that I have learned in Mark's classes and John Kells' workshops over the years. The sitting augments the T'ai Chi and is fully integrated with it, rather than being some other random thing I do. I would be happy to arrange an informal thing at my boat for folks to come sit together sometimes. Let me know if you are interested. There's room for about 6 of us. I also love to sit when out in nature. I wrap up warm, as it's the UK after all, so a cosy shawl and a waterproof picnic blanket from a charity shop are the most useful little bits of kit I could recommend. The best place of all to practise is right where you happen to be now.

I would be very grateful to hear from any of our T'ai Chi family about any good places you have meditated. In the meantime, I hope this helps, happy sitting.

Here's the first reply from one of the Scottish students:

'To follow up your blog about meditation centre, i would wholeheartedly hint at Plum village (thich nhat hanh). 

Lovely place of transformation & healing, the whole place is infused with decades of alive practice. Everyone is encouraged to take every step & action mindfully during the whole day,  the atmosphere is also very joyous. ;-) The practice is complemented with beautiful grounds, forest, orchards, weather, halls, woody campsite & delicious vietnamese food (not exclusively)!

The only main itch can be their very fluid & organic organisation, which can appear as disorganisation. ;-) '

    What's missing from this picture?

    ... a 'meditation' selfie would surely break the internet, as well as my heart.

   (If they actually do exist, please don't tell me.)

Taoist Meditation

I just finished this wonderful book, another translation by the esteemed Thomas Cleary. Between this slim volume and Cleary's translation of 'Secret Of The Golden Flower' we have a complete method and guide for Taoist meditation, which fully integrates with and is complementary to our T'ai Chi. I cannot recommend them more highly. However they are not necessarily useful to the beginner without a working knowledge of the Taoist Classics. My plan over the Late Summer is to compile a brief primer to the foundation practices in these wonderful books, so that those of us who might like to practice together can have a common start point, leading to a sitting group in the future, (or more cake and sitting solo for me if no one turns up!). No problem either way...

If you do a web search for Taoist meditation, London, Taoism groups, etc., you get a whole bunch of Mantak Chia based Chinese energy and Taoist hygeine folks, no offence to them and their genuinely health-enhancing practices, but I am with Liu I Ming on this issue (look it up), so these groups are not for me. This morning I went along to a friendly Zen sitting group in Wimbledon, which was great. Many of the teachings of the Northern School of Complete Reality Taoisim (yes, wonderful name lsn't it?) are shared between Ch'an (later in Japan called Zen, in Korea it's called Son), so sitting zazen is a good place to sit with like-minded folks. Often the practices between Ch'an, Zen and Taoism are exactly the same and just have different terminology. Cleary's translation of The Secret Of The Golden Flower is particularly good on this. When I sat a Son retreat with Stephen and Martine Batchelor a couple of years ago, Stephen called Zen 'Taoist Buddhism'. The roots are certainly intertwined and the enlightened mind to which all refer, is the same: also the emptiness of all phenomena, conditioned arising, and so on. 

Mindful that the Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao... I shall stop writing now and get an early night. 

Term

Two more weeks of term in London then straight in to the Summer workshop. I am away all weekend but will be available for questions and admin in the fortnight leading up to the intensive. I will post more T'ai Chi book reviews here and will also have news of a new Taoist meditation group that will meet once a month for (Son-style) sitting-and-walking sessions, hopefully start in September. Recommended reading and practice advice soon, let me know if you might like to come along. It'll be pretty informal and won't cost anything, unless we ever hire a hall. Have a good weekend.

Spring is here - all change!

Hawthorn bush on the lock island.

 

This is a time of change and growth for all creatures in nature, and it's no different for me. Soon there will almost certainly be a change of venue for the Hackney Round Chapel class, after over 8 years there with me teaching, and another 5 years before that with teachers from our T'ai Chi family. This is due to the hall hire prices becoming too high for us to absorb, without making fees prohibitively high, or starting a brand new beginners course, which I do not wish to do. there are already two excellent groups at the venue, the Short and Long Form group, and the Senior students studying the Dance. We could not compress that all into a shorter class either, which has been suggested, as we are barely fitting all the goodness in already. I will give details at class next week, and will post it all on the website, Taichifinder and here after I have spoken with the students in person. We have a great new venue that I am looking forward to sharing with folks.

 

 

Upcoming events for T'ai Chi (I will produce a flyer for all classes next week)

 



Sabre - St Mary Magdalene Church Hall, 2-5pm Sunday 22nd March - all welcome including beginners, £20.

An Introduction to simple Taoist Meditation - at my place, details in person, 7-8.30pm Monday 23rd March, free. Session will be repeated on a Saturday in next few weeks for those who can't make it. all GR and TCC students are welcome. Tea will be served.

Heartwork, Sword, Sabre and Staff workshops continue all year as usual after that, details on blog already, but will update and repost shortly.

I am looking forward to working with the Scottish students from tomorrow and all weekend in Aberdeenshire. See you soon.

Today

Meditation cushion, T'ai Chi Classics, Dark Mountain, library note book I have had since I was 11, woolly jumper... 'these are a few of my favourite things'.

My neighbours went thaddaway.

Halo round the moon.

Immortal Sisters

I have just reread this book, subtitled 'Secret Teachings of Taoist Women', translated and edited by Thomas Cleary. It was most excellent, again. Also, for women who sit in meditation, it has very important information about where to place the mind intent when commencing. These instructions differ from those given to men. If you are  a student and do not have access to this book and wish to know more, please get in touch.

'She enters the water without making a ripple.'

The Slow Coach

I only caught a snippet of this programme on Radio 4 today, but the little I heard on the  effects of mindfulness sounded very interesting. It's available to listen again for the next 7 days.

Last week I was mostly...

...

Assisting Mark with the senior students at Balvack.

Sadly missing last night's Tuesday sabre session due to gut rot.

Hearing about Mark's excellent and busy beginners session in Aberdeenshire.

Admiring a huge plane tree outside Gaia House

Sitting and walking meditating in silence all week in here.

Visiting the sun hut at the top of the hill and finding this.

Appreciating the giant oak tree.

To maintain the great doubt,
paradoxically,
one develops great faith.

 ..."Negative Capability, that is, when a man is capable of being in uncertainties, mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after fact and reason ..."
- John Keats, quoted by Stephen Batchelor during his Dharma talks, when he said that this may be the best description of Zen available in English.

Zen Retreat and T'ai Chi in Aberdeenshire

...I am only just back at my desk, and screens are holding little appeal for me. I plan to post some pics over the week. The Zen retreat was marvellous. Thanks to Peter for the very best Zen stories ever, all the way home on the train from Newton Abbot.

"hmm, good, but there is better answer!!!"

The weekend in Aberdeenshire with Mark's superb teaching was wonderful to 'come home to'. Thanks to all who attended for their great work and delicious cooking.

Mark's next visit to Hackney Class

My teacher Mark Raudva will next be teaching the class at Hackney Round Chapel on Wednesday 24th April, with Carmen assisting. Class timings, topics and fees are not affected. I am sad to be missing it but hope you all enjoy the evening. I will be here on a silent meditation retreat.