Saturday

Headed up to Camden today to do T'ai Chi and Heartwork with Duncan. I dropped in to Soho first to get some rubber soled shoes to use in the park, as it has rained at last, and the air is fresher and cooler for a wee while. The guy in the martial arts shop has worked there for years, though he appears quite young, and I have heard that he can be unfriendly, but he was incredibly warm and inquisitive about our T'ai Chi, although I can't remember how we got talking about it anyway. I am walking round with the strangest feeling as if there is something big protruding out of my chest into the space in front of me! It seems to be part of me and feels like I am being pulled along by it. No one has yet pointed and stared in horror, so I am not worrying about it...

In the park we did all the Heartwork partnerwork that involed touching, deeming the no-touch work a little too intense for the passing toddlers and mums. Later we did Ta Lu, Wapu and different pushing hands work. Obviously, Duncan could pretzel me in a moment, but that wasn't the point. No-one has his warmth, energy and sheer enthusiasm for life. I showed him some sabre form with the bokken and we worked with that with no fear of gouging holes in anyone's ceiling. Teenagers poured into the park at the end of the afternoon, and by 7pm there was a large bunch of girls jeering us and saying had we learned that stuff from 'chinks'? They soon tired of us so two boys came closer constantly asking for attention, shouting, heckling, swearing, shouting insults, asking if we were 'gay' and trying to seem cool in each other's eyes. What was particularly sad and strange was that one of them said: 'is that T'ai chi' before realising he had sounded uncool in seeming at all interested and peer-pressure made him relapse into his habitual blase behavior.

Just keep remembering so many things from the weekend... Just now recalled John advising us not to be so preoccupied with habitual thoughts or worries about plans, mortgages, work, etc, that you miss the love of your life, or the most precious chance for a unique connection with someone you see every day.